Showing posts with label Cinema. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cinema. Show all posts

Thursday, June 2, 2011

It's human nature to fear the unusual: A critical look at Batman Returns

The inspiration to write a post struck me late at night, and here I sit in the dark attempting to set a record straight and right injustices against a family name, much like Oswald Cobblepot aka The Penguin pouring over birth certificates in the hall of records about a third of the way through Batman Returns. The family name I’m out to defend is that of the Burton Batman films, and this one in particular which as Christopher Walken elegantly puts it “frankly has a bum rep.” Perhaps the conclusions you can draw from the film’s plot itself and the reputation it has are eerily similar. Abandoned at it’s conception by critics and “comic fans” alike, Returns perhaps isn’t nearly as bad as some make it out to be, only misunderstood by those who can’t see past the grotesque exterior. Much like Batman himself, I feel the need to defend something which cannot save itself, and much like Catwoman; the subject matter at hand is too sexy and insane to be revered in the eyes of the public.

Batman 89’, which I might have been too harsh analyzing is still universally respected by critics and comic fans, many of whom are too bitter and jaded to admit that it may very well be a more true-to-form Batman and Joker story than The Dark Knight. Its sequel Returns however, falls prey to several complaints that are almost always the same by anyone criticizing it; which I’ve heard so many times that I’d venture to call them stereotypical critiques. While Batman 89 is decidedly dated at times and often very aged and misguided feeling in parts, I feel like Batman Returns builds and expands on the themes while incasing the story within the austere whimsical world of Tim Burton. I’d go so far as to say that Batman Returns is the most stylistically affected, though not afflicted, film Burton has ever done. This was a director at his peak; and it’s a shame to see how studios lost faith in these macabre visions for a while after this film’s release.

Perhaps one of the biggest faults Returns has, isn’t even to blame on the film itself so much as the untimely and nonsensical summer release. This is a Christmas film through and through, though it explores the darker and less jolly aspects of the holiday. Prevalent arctic themes, tree lightings and even a bittersweet wishing of Merry Christmas on the last line of the film add to the perversion of the holiday across a comic book landscape.

But wait…one of the main complaints about the movie is that it’s not a very good comic book film and it’s bogged down by being too unrealistic. Ask yourself for a moment if ANY film with a man dressing up like a bat, a woman dressing up like a cat and a man called “the penguin” can ever be interpreted as true-to-life and that argument goes out the window. Perhaps you’re looking for the hyper realism served up in The Dark Knight. You might notice that every moment the most whimsical and unrealistic character, The Joker, who seems to bend the laws of space and time with his all-too-convenient plans is not on screen. Compare that to the romantic arc in Batman Returns. Batman and Catwoman are enemies but Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne are potentially lovers. Upon realizing each other’s identity for the first time, the immediate question posed is “do we start fighting?” This is a great way to delve into the psychological aspect of Batman. He’s often conflicted in his best moments by circumstances that make him want to give up his crusade; times when he’ll rise to the occasion and prove himself to be the true hero that he is. If you're questioning the scene where he kills a thug with dynamite you might as well question the scene where he levels Axis chemicals with explosives in 89', and also take into account that Bob Kane's Batman smoked a pipe and carried a gun. You have to wonder if Bruce meant what he said when he took off his cowl at the end of Returns and asked Selina to come away with him, or if he already knew she would never attempt to lead a “normal” life. Compare this to when Bruce wants to give up being Batman as a result of Rachel being DEAD in The Dark Knight. It makes for an excellent Batman arc…which contradicts how a lot of people say this isn’t a “Batman film.”

Isn’t the whole point of Batman the idea that he’s like an urban legend that strikes fear into the heart of his enemies? Batman isn’t going to flaunt around in every scene. That takes away a crucial element of mystery. Besides, he had his origin story in Batman 89. While the films don’t blend seamlessly given the shrunken scope of Gotham in Returns, you already know this Batman and what he’s capable of. Keaton delivers the same anger-fueled insanity in the role as he does in 89. If you don’t think there’s enough Batman in Returns, ask yourself what more was needed. As opposed to one villain in the first film, now there’s two that are extremely well developed, more so than any others in superhero films with multiple antagonists and there’s more action in this film than just about any of the other Batman films save for 89; all thanks to Batman and his comic book inspired arsenal of gadgets.

People have said that Returns is too dark for a comic book movie, but look at Watchmen on the other end of the spectrum…since when did comic books need to be lighter fare for kids? In addition to bringing comic book movies into the spotlight, 89 also legitimatized them as films for adults and kids alike. Returns knows exactly what it wants to be. It’s not totally stuck in fantasy, but it’s not grounded in realism either. It’s carved out a nice niche for itself in between the campiness of the silver age Batman comics and their outrageous plots and the darkness of its predecessor of a film. Part of the appeal of comic books at the time of their introduction as a graphic medium was the ability to convey the impossible without limitations opening up new kinds of storytelling. Now this is becoming more and more possible thanks to CGI, but it’s great to see a film that was able to set its own standards and create a unique world in the span of roughly 2 hours. It’s just the right blend of black comedy and horror tragedy while still safely under the mantle of Batman.

The iconography of a Batman film is present throughout Returns, often times less in-your-face than it is in the newer films or in 89’. For example: pimping the bat logo. There’s an unforgettably moronic shot in Batman 89 where the Batwing flies past the moon and creates the bat logo. Not only does this defy physics, but it’s superfluous. Even less realistically, the Begins Bat signal is comprised of a prisoner wearing cut rags tied to a searchlight. How about a nice way to tie in the iconic logo and the bat signal without shoving it down our throat like the simple shot of Wayne reading in Returns when the logo shines through the window and he stands up and looks at it. It’s simple. It’s effective. It’s purely badass. Some would say that the shape of the bat signal is too precise…I have to argue, does that matter AT ALL? Like I mentioned before, realism flies out the window period in comic book films, so the logistics of the shape of bat signal are much less relevant than the source of the logo being from a tormented Arkham escapee or an idiotic shot of the batwing blocking the moon. Also part of the Batman iconography in addition to the obvious batsuit, is the Batmobile. While the design of the Batmobile is introduced in 89, the scenes with it are a bit unceremonious and don’t really show off the sleek awesomeness of the vehicle to its full potential. There’s something very “constructed” and fake about it as it cruises through the streets tipping fruit stands. In Returns, it’s a viable threat when it’s under the penguins control, driving recklessly through streets and smashing cars at top speed. Then in one of the single greatest and most innovative comic book movie moments I can think of, the Batmobile splits off the sides into the “Batmissile” to squeeze through a narrow gap between two buildings. It’s this same kind of enthusiasm you see in the “Batpod” scene of The Dark Knight that really makes the truck chase scene stand out. It’s Batman being one step ahead, and ready for anything.

Which brings me to refute another fault of the film, is that The Penguin isn’t a credible threat to Batman. Physically, he never was, and never should be, even in comics. The appearance of the character, deformed physically and mentally in Burton’s vision immediately creates a more formidable presence than anything prior in the comics or other adaptations. The audience fears the Penguin. He admonishes the viewer for treating him differently. First invoking feelings of fear, then pity, and then feelings of hate, the same cycle of emotions that Shreck and the other denizens of Gotham feel towards Penguin in the film. Batman, ever-vigilant is never scared of The Penguin because he knows what he has to do to stop him. Despite his confidence, The Penguin still manages to nearly kill Batman several times in the film, including the Batmobile bomb, an umbrella gun at the end and with the penguin commandos.

One of my friends in particular, a fellow Batman enthusiast faults the film the most for the inclusion of the “penguin commandos” aka live penguin army that lives in the sewer and eventually waddles into the streets of gotham with rocket launchers strapped to their backs while responding to a frequency signal. I think given the absurd nature of the rest of the film, this fits in pretty well. With every failed attempt, the Penguin continues to get angrier and angrier at Batman until he goes to an extreme which he’s clearly had in reserve for a long time coming. This is every bit as dangerous, if not more so than the Joker spraying the city with laughing gas from parade balloons or say…fear toxin in the water supply. If anything I would say that this is slightly more believable than those. If you’re asking how penguin could have possibly acquired the resources, then you also have to ask yourself how The Joker is able to employ Police Officers in The Dark Knight and plant a bomb inside of an inmate while unarmed inside of a holding cell. There’s certain things you just have to accept because like it or not…Batman is still based on a comic book, and like I said earlier, comic books serve to tell stories in a visually appealing way which you couldn’t find elsewhere. As Returns plays out like a big screen comic complete with it’s own artistic style, taking the penguin commando army in stride should be easy to get past after the first five minutes of seeing a baby eat a cat and get tossed into a sewer. At worst you can laugh at these “lighter” deaths and at best you can build a hatred of The Penguin’s pathetic character. The pathos are all there. I would say that there’s less suspension of disbelief involved in frequency controlled penguins than Doc Ock controlling tentacles with his “brain chip” in Spiderman 2…or even the concept of a Spider bite giving someone super powers. I don’t see how it could be difficult to accept, especially in a universe as absurd as Batman’s.

So I’ve written a lot now trying to defend Returns from various possible criticisms (Why do people always bring tomatoes to speeches?) but what sets it apart from the rest? I can safely say that personally, as a lifelong Batman fan, Returns may be the most enjoyable Batman film to me. While for nostalgic reasons, The Dark Knight is still the most fun I ever had with a film given all the hype surrounding the release, Returns is worth a watch if you can overlook the lack of Nolan.

It’s the perfect mix of comic Batman characters with elements of movies ranging from comedy to horror. The suit is there. The tech is certainly there (remote controlled batarang anyone?). The action sequences are tight and well edited. On top of that, it also has my personal favorite musical score of all time for a film. Dark brooding, moody circus music perfectly fits the character of the Penguin and the slinky, screeching effects suit Catwoman’s character very well. Elfman also expands on the already great Batman theme from 89 and mixes the best cues when Batman is on screen with heightened versions of the Penguin suite when the characters are intercut on screen (such as the pursuit of the penguin through the sewers in the third act).

Speaking of the pursuit scene…out of all the secondary bat vehicles introduced in the third act of the Batman films (Batplane, Batwing, Bat sub, Batpod, Bat…sled…) the Batskiboat which narrowly dodges wayward missiles from Penguin Commandos is by far the coolest and most practical. There’s this great overwhelming presence of the absurd in Batman Returns, but the subject matter is so dark (I’ve heard people compare the film to an inkwell) that it’s hard to laugh at it. I think it’s a great mix for a Batman movie. It’s sad, often poignant at times, but also tends to feel like a sitcom akin to the 1966 Batman show crossed with the Addam’s Family. It’s a perfect cross between darkness and camp…beauty and the beast if you will.

One of the greatest scenes in the film is the death of the Penguin. After he has supposedly fallen to his watery grave through glass, he emerges dripping blood and bile from the water behind Batman, in one final attempt to kill him. He reaches for an umbrella, and accidentally "picks a cute one" before collapsing needing a "cold drink of ice water." Hated by everyone his entire life, in his death, the penguins emerge from the corners of his sewer lair and drag him into the water to sink to the bottom. It's touching, bizarre even to Batman, who watches the procession unfold. The music is powerful, sad and extremely fitting. It's incredible to see an incredibly humanizing and tragic end to a character that is so easy for most people to hate throughout the film.

Rather than just elude to the accepted truths of the Batman mythos like the super-urban high tech current films, grim to the core, I think Batman Returns is a good superhero film that’s certainly worth watching again if you feel like it’s “stupid” or not a “batman film.” I wish I could have spent more time praising the nuances in Devito’s performance or the greatness of Catwoman’s role in this film as the only truly well written female character in the Batman series’, but the pitiful legacy Returns has acquired among comic fans made this more of a crusade to set the record right. Though I would hardly call myself a Returns apologist…as there’s nothing to be sorry for. This is an excellent film.

"Come what may...Merry Christmas Mr. Wayne..."

"Merry Christmas Alfred. Goodwill toward men. And women."

Thursday, September 30, 2010

4:00 in the morning and it's an exciting time for film

Well alot of people said 2010 has sucked. I disagree, because I've really enjoyed a handful of films this year. The thing is though, those 5 films that I enjoyed were the only films I saw that were worth a shit this year. So in a sense I can agree with those who have been knocking this year for cinema. I know it's really early to be doing any sort of Oscar pooling, but I am really excited for a few films at the present point in time...so much so that I can't sleep. What films you might ask? Well how about I count down a list and you pretend like you care and maybe you might learn something? I'm going to count down films coming out either this year or next year until I hit my most anticipated release (2011 is the cutoff cause 2012 is just too far to think ahead without a Batman trailer)...

10. Green HornetI'll be the first to admit this doesn't look that great...but I liked the pacing and flow of the trailer quite a bit and I like Seth Rogan and Waltz so it should be pretty fun. This is just the tip of the ice berg for upcoming movies though so I had to toss in a few bullshit ones.

9. Harry fucking PotterHas anyone else gotten a vibe of legitimacy from the past few potter films? Like they're actually stylish, and not just in the sense of grand stupid adaptations. Like...they actually have given me the chills on occasion, especially when Alan Rickman is doing something awesome. This newest one is being marketed as the most important movie you'll ever see to the point where it will burn your fucking eyeballs out of your skull, but at the same time I half believe it. I grew up with this limey bastard and this is the conclusion of his story. Whose going to die? We already know but watching the epic trainwreck play out and possibly win a cinematography Oscar in the process is going to be quite the sight...

8. Due Date
I love Zach Gally and I love RDJ. Putting them together is almost insulting. Comedic genius at the same time. On that visceral level, I'm pretty pumped for this, but at the same time, I was genuinely disturbed by the trailer because Zach is the entire focus of the situational comedy. No love for RDJ. In fact, he's the butt of the joke in most of the cases. A total straight man. If you've seen Tropic Thunder, you know that RDJ can be pretty damn funny himself and it's sad to see him made a fool of and not get to do anything witty and just get pissed off the entire movie. You could have hired a lesser actor for that kind of gig. At the same time I can't wait to laugh at Zach's antics, even if I'll come out of it feeling slightly guilty.

7. Battle: Los Angeles
So this one is quite a few months off, but it's got a few things I like: post apocalypse. stupid action violence. Aaron Eckhart screaming and most of all...Michelle Rodriguez, whose kicks a ton of ass. I'll be seeing this one on opening day no doubt.

6. Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger TidesAlright call me an idiot or whatever, but I really enjoy these films. I liked the first one and I enjoyed the second one despite it being crap. The third one was pretty wretched but I'm confident that without Orlando Bloom on the payroll it has serious potential. This is roll that Johnny Depp is made for and I'm sure alot of people will be happy to see him making a comeback.

5. Paranormal Activity 2 I know my horror movies, and I know that I haven't been scared by one in a few years. Paranormal Activity was as effective as they come though. As soon as it ended I was a bit sad, that this unique and audience captivating experience probably wouldn't come along again for several years...after all, the main characters died...how can there be a sequel? Well, the public demands more, and much like the prequels of star wars, I fully expect the ruination of a good thing. I'd be lying out my ass though if I can't say I was totally giddy seeing a trailer for ANOTHER paranormal activity so soon though. Hopefully it's as gut wrenching as the first one was, but that will be a hard act to follow. If this movie didn't scare you...I'd like to know what did.

4. Green Lantern
This is a really good superhero concept that APPLIES to movies. Like I'm not sure why this is just a movie now. Lantern is deserving as any for a film and Renolds is a great lead role. I think this has serious potential to be a stellar film (unlike Thor, which wont even make this list). This will also prove (if it doesnt suck) that DC knows what they're doing outside of Batman and can make films that compete with Marvel. I'm not too well read on this character, but I know it has a lot of potential.

3. Black Swan
Arronovsky. Padme Amidala. Meg Griffin. What a fucking epic combination. I'm only half kidding too. This movie looks absurdly creepy and well crafted at the same time. Lesbians, ballet, nightmare sequences and people turning into swans. I can't quite explain what it's about (and I dont want to spoil it for myself either) but this movie is getting a lot of hype and I'm getting pretty excited to experience it for myself. Just look at that poster. Aldready winning awards! Before the poster was even designed no less. Not that that says anything except PRETENTIOUS, but I think we need one of these "elite" films shoved into the mix every once in a while to remind us we have individual thinking ability.

2. Captain America

This WOULD be my most anticipated, but I don't trust Marvel. I trust Johnson. He made Rocketeer a pretty entertaining film, and it would fit the mood of a cap movie perfectly. Not sure I like Chris Evans as the lead, especially cause it retcons marvel's already troubled universe of films. But here's the thing. I love Cap. He's my favorite hero outside of Batman. I like the jingoism. I like the old timey symbol of hope in world war 2. I also really like Red Skull (and Hugo Weaving is good casting at that). If only I had more faith they were actually interested in making an original and even poignant film, instead of trying to fit into the stupid avengers project (which WILL suck) and compromising the direction their story could take.

1. True Grit
Coen Brothers. Jeff Bridges. Cowboys. Brolin. Damon. Badass little girl character. Just watch the perfectly paced, and musically cued trailer. This is the masterpiece of the bunch I can already tell. The Coen Brothers are at the top of their game, true masters in the art of directing: perfect and simplistic and chilling all at once. This one looks to have a bit of satisfying action to boot. The trailer manages to give me chills every time. Christmas day hopefully will bring us the Oscar film of the year.


well I'm tired. I'm sure I forgot some upcoming movies to look forward to.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

The top 20 movie villains of all time

And those who disagree with me "suck cock by choice." -Deadwood

I think everyones a villain in deadwood. I've only caught a few episodes so far but the hilarious way they mistreat each other and every character in the show is pretty riveting. I love their old-timey foul language. I'm wondering how I missed this show in its prime in 2006.

So in consolidating a top villains list I've asked a few friends their opinions but I've largely disregarded them and tried to go with my gut instinct. I think before starting in I have to establish the things that make these characters I've chosen great villains. I didn't want to pick typical or even obvious choices. I'm hoping that in reading this list you might want to go back and rewatch some of the films these characters appear in and witness their offenses against society again with a fresh perspective.

So what am I looking for in a great villain?

-The intentions of the character. Are they the solid and unquestionable antagonist of the film? For this reason I'm not choosing or including characters like Daniel Plainview since he's the protagonist. I believe a villain is someone you're supposed to root against in a film regardless of the evil shit they're doing. I can't choose someone like Captain Spaulding from Devil's Rejects for the same reasons.

-Memorable. A great villain is a memorable character, usually more so than the hero. This might be because their actions are either so disgusting or frightening or they simply leave a greater impression on the viewer. A screen presence and a resonance with the viewer is why I chose the characters I did. Part of the memorability of a character is the delivery of the lines as well as the visual appeal of the character. Or lack of appeal.

-What makes them evil? What makes them wrong? It's even better when they're in a position of being unwillingly the antagonist. Are they just hardwired to do wrong or is there a moral struggle there? Either way it's interesting whether you have someone whose soul is pitch black or if you have someone whose trying to come to grips with their actions.

So why villains? Why write this post? Well villains have always been the most riveting characters in any film, at least to me. It's more fun to be bad ist the common excuse but let's think about it on a more psychological level. Most of us can't relate to rescuing our daughter from the mob or becoming a jedi. We've never seen Mufasa fall off a cliff and been scarred for life as a result of it or battled robots from the future. We can however, relate to internal conflict and the pressure to conform and feelings of loss, rejection, revenge...villains are weak to human emotion. "The Sith are fueled by their passion". Unlike the protagonists in most films, you can relate to alot of villains in a realistic way. They're motivated by rage, anger, or just out of spite. The best of us are able to rise above that, but for the majority of the human race, people fall victim to character flaws.

Without further ado I'm going to write the shit out of this.

20. Agent Smith-The Matrix.
I figured we'd start off with a chilling and nasty but also a rather bland character. Agent Smith isn't a terribly compelling or even interesting character but you get the sense that he cannot be stopped. He runs the "world" of the Matrix. He can bend the rules of reality. When the protagonist Neo is completely new to the situation and is learning his "powers" Agent Smith uses this to his own advantage. Hugo Weaving is pretty great in the role too, not only playing a singular character but an entire "army" of clones within the Matrix. He proves that you don't have to look abnormal or scarred or have a crazy costume to give off an air of evil. He's just a man in a suit with sunglasses and despite this, he's ominous.

19. Hook-Dustin Hoffman
One of two pirates to make the list, Hook is a pretty goofy character but I will still attest to this day (and possibly due to nostalgia) that Hook is my favorite of Hoffman's roles. Crazy. Classy. Sophisticated and frumpy to the enth degree, he doesn't really fit the bill for a text book pirate. Hook is an eccentric...just look at those goddamn glasses! He's got some good lines too. When I was a kid, Hook was the man, but in the Peter Pan disney cartoon, you just feel bad for him because he's totally inept. In this movie, Hook is like some warped artist who Peter Pan is trying to prevent from painting great things. He lives on a waterworld type air craft carrier and uses like steampunk technology ahead of his time. He also employs Bob Hoskins. Anyone who employs Mario Mario is a worthy and intimidating villain.

18. Amon Goeth-Schindler's List
In addition to having multiple pirates, we also have multiple Nazis on this list. Goeth is the first, and I'll admit I wouldn't have thought to include him if not for the lovely Tyler Lopachin (who is in fact, not a movie villain but rather a small boy who likes movies). This character is the epitomy of evil, without regard for human life. He's not just a Nazi following orders, he's sadistic too. You really get the sense watching him that people like him did exist at one point in time, and in the darker annals of the world, they still do. He's real cruelty personified, and there's almost nothing human about him, despite how he appears clean cut and normal to outward appearances.

17. Oogie Boogie-The Nightmare Before Christmas

Oogie Boogie doesn't really fall into the genuine "evil" category so much as goofy but at the same time, he's really out of place in what's otherwise kind of a kids movie. He puts it over the top. There's characters in this movie who are willing to kidnap Santa Claus and even characters who try to ruin an important holiday. There's only one character though, whose crazy and unscrupulous enough to want to BOIL santa claus and kill anyone who even so much as enters his lair. Even his henchmen (teenagers who run with the wrong crowd) are afraid of him. In a land full of monsters and ghosts and talking trees how can someone be dehumanized to the point where they're unrelatable? Well, not to give any spoilers or anything...but Oogie Boogie is made out of hundreds upon hundreds of insects functioning as a collective. He also sings jazzy sorts of music and gambles with snakes. I think Oogie falls into the realm of being so weird that he makes a great villain, which was important in a movie full of quirky weirdness and twisted morals. They needed someone extreme.

16. Jack Torrance-The Shining
Jack Nicholson's a pretty crazy dude...but when he's psychotic he makes for a great villain. I don't mean like the Joker...in the Shining he's like axe murderer psychotic, and laughing about it the whole time. You get the sense that a guy having this much fun chasing people to their death is someone that can't be stopped. He's really enjoying this, and there's a serious creepiness and uneasiness about him when he's on screen. He's also probably the only "horror" movie villain (even though I'd venture to say The Shining is more of a thriller movie) to make the list, which means he had to be pretty damn good.

15. Barbossa-Pirates of the CaribbeanFrom the accent to the monkey to the ability to turn into a skeleton in the moonlight, Barbossa is the spirit of piracy. He's the iconography of the profession from the humor of the character to the stench of booze and body odor that almost permeates the movie screen. He can be threatening but in dire straights, he's been known to work with the protagonists. In the first movie however, he's purely an antagonist. He can be charming and civilized but at the end of the day he's THE pirate captain. Jack needs to step aside. As much as I like Hook, and even Davy Jones in the same franchise, neither of them got shit on Barbossa. I feel like this character gets overlooked too with some of the more "high concept" characters in the pirates franchise, but lest we forget the true nature of pirates. Just ignore that stupid pirate code.

14. Hans Gruber-Die Hard
Alan Rickman was born to play villains. In Die Hard, as terrorist/suave meglomaniac, he's one step ahead of Bruce Willis as John McClane throughout the film. While not neccessarily a physical threat, Gruber toys with McClane until he meets his predictable and yet graceful end by falling off of a building. There's something memorable about every villain and I think his death and his accent are the selling points for Hans Gruber. He's considered one of the quintessential dasdardly villain characters motivated by revenge and money, and I just wouldn't feel comfortable making a top 20 without him. For some, when Rickman was cast as Snape in the Potter franchise, it seemed like an unlikely choice. For those of us who grew up with Die Hard, he seemed like a natural for the role.

13. Alec Trevelyan-Goldeneye The Bond series is full of memorable characters, from the Bonds themselves, to the girls to the villains. But most of the villains are remembered for being corny like Jaws or Christopher Walken or Grace Jones being freakishly tall or Odd Job for being freakishly short. None of them are really even matches for James Bond. Blofeld is simply too old fashioned and out of place to be taken seriously. So who is the antithesis of James Bond? His best friend/Cossack traitor Alec Trevelyan. Once 006, Alec fakes Bond out in the beginning of the movie only to later try to seize all the money from England's banks with the threat of a satellite he plans to kill everyone with if he doesn't get it. When Bond calls him a common theif, he tells Bond he has a small mind. How can James bring himself to kill his best friend? Is there any redeemable aspect of this man or is the good in him totally lost? Or was he ever good? Combine this with the fact that he's a physical and intellectual aspect to James Bond and you have a worthy antagonist for just about any film, not just the slightly dated, Goldeneye.

12. Hannibal Lector -Silence of the Lambs
I think including Hannibal on the list is pretty much a given. I really debated it too since I'm trying to avoid horror characters, but for my purposes, this is ONLY inclusive of Hannibal in the original Silence of the Lambs. Despite his lack of screen time (as I learned in a recent trivia game only 15 minutes or so total) he's a really creepy screen presence. I mean...not only is he a cannibal but he's an intelligent sophistcate. There's quite a contrast there. He's a conversationalist who society seems to fail to understand. At the same time, he just might be psychotic.

11. Jabba The Hutt-Return of the Jedi
While not the main villain in Star Wars, Jabbas pretty memorable. Not only is he evil but he's disgusting. Physically unattractive and imposing, surrounded by henchmen and totally amorale, Jabba is not someone you'd want to be chained to, which is exactly the situation Princess Leia finds herself in. Given Jabba's track record of feeding his dancing girls to the Rancor when they try to fight off his sexual advances, Leia's pretty fucked, and not possibly in any good sort of way. Despite all the odds against her though, Leia proves herself as a resiliant heroine when she's able to strangle Jabba to death. For a dirty old slug man though, Jabba has a full arsenal of thugs, torture droids and even a sand pit with a vagina. He might just be one of the most disgusting characters in all of cinema. Revolting as a "person" and revolting physically too, Jabba is well deserving as a back up villain from Star Wars that still makes the cut.

10. Anton Chighur-No Country For Old Men

I realized that in a similar sense to Hannibal, my list will be invalidated if I don't include Lurch here. Now, I realize I'm in the majority here but I don't think this character is nearly as effective as some do. Crazy. Obnoxious. Silent. He's the perfect killer, but highly unlikeable. He lacks personality, but in many respects that failture to humanize him might make him all the more villainous. I think that might be the point of him though, you want him to be stopped but, SPOILERS, he never is. Eventually a car hits him, but that's only a minor deterrant to his rampage, like all other attempts to stop him in the movie. He employs a variety of tactis from compressed air pumps to silenced shotguns and coinflips (which serve no real purpose) to sadistically finish off his victims. Anton is a force of nature in the film, though I didn't find him nearly as memorable as he comes off in many reviews. Regardless of this, he's got a great and unnerving screen prescence and he's clearly the strongest character in this poignant film.

9. Scar-The Lion KingWhile he might be a cartoon, Scar is everything evil. He's physically deformed. He's power hungry. He's lazy. He's got a thick British accent. He kills his own brother. He's a failed politician. There's something very real and very sinister about him for someone whose not even human. His motivation is purely to be in control. Scars got a major superiority complex. He's pretty black to the core, but he's fun to try and attempt to relate to. The fact that Disney gaves him a pretty cool musical number really helps give him an edge too. Eventually, after a climactic battle, Simba doesn't have to lower himself to Scar's level as Scar is betrayed by his own subjects which he promised food to and didn't deliver. A fitting end.

8. That Yellow Bastard-Sin City This guy is a scary and rotten piece of shit. A pedophile whose impossible to be legally repremanded as the son of a senator, Rourke Junior (aka yellow Bastard) goes after the girl he preyed on years ago once his dad is able to use technology to regrow his nuts so he can carry on the terrible family legacy. This guy is so bad he sponsors a farm where another freak eats the women he murders/and or rapes. They mount heads on the wall and feed bodies to dogs. Do you need to hear anymore? You really get to hate this guy and when Bruce Willis decribes the way he smells, you don't doubt it for a second. So what sort of come-uppins can possibly satisfy a sadistic unreedmable assole like this? One of the greatest villain deaths in any movie. Bruce Willis rips his nuts off with his bare hands and proceeds to pound him in the face until he's "pounding skull chunks into the floor" Only Frank Miller had the cajones to write this shit, but audiences all cheered when this guy went down.

7. Frank Booth-Blue Velvet
Frank Booth isn't just some criminal. He's absolutely insane. He's a festishist and while vunerable, he's got some deep seated mental issues; possibly from frequent misuse of helium. He's memorable and scary because he's unpredictable. While generally unpleasant, he seems to explode and make split decisions in the blink of an eye. You can tell he's never kidding either and he absolutely believes every word he spouts, which is usually some sort of obscenity. "HEINEKIN? FUCK THAT SHIT. PABST BLUE RIBBON" is among his memorable lines. Another weird scene with Frank involves his need for "inferiority" in his sexual relations where he calls the woman he's "making love to" his mother but then yells at her for looking at him. It's unpleasant stuff to watch but you also have to wonder what makes him tick. While he doesn't die a very good death, or even live a very happy life, Frank is among the most mentally deficient and crazy villains in the history of cinema.

6. The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot-Batman Returns While Danny Devito was the natural choice for the role of the Penguin, he completely disappears into the part. Many fans complain that this version o f the penguin is too much of a deviation from the comics, over acted, too dark, etc. but I think you have to put aside fanboyishness for a second and look into the tormented world of this unique character. This might not seem like a natural choice for this list, and despite the often corny and overly dark nature of the film at times, the character of the Penguin is funny, sadistic and deformed but also absurdly human at the same time. He's been rejected his entire life. Rejected by his parents and rejected by society. Even when he tries to ascend, Batman is there to put a stop to it because it's illegal. He gets more screen time than Batman too. So whose the protagonist in Batman Returns? Is it the tortured deformed man whose been trapped in the sewer his whole life shielded from human emotion or is it the crazy billionaire dressed as a bat who wishes to put him behind bars? As the penguin puts it "It's in human nature to fear the unusual" as he finds his parents a little too late after resurfacing into society. He lays roses at their graves in a pariticularly touching scene. Eventually, The Penguin lashes out at the society who rejected him and got his false hopes up as a "mayoral prospect" by attempting to kidnap the first born children of the city, of which he himself should have been one had he not been born deformed. The character is cruel...but can you blame him? Unloved by everyone except his pet penguins, in the touching finale of the film, the dying Penguin is carried into the water by his sewer raised pets, also rejected by society and unloved. This terrible and depraved creature was loved afterall. It's a very moving scene and a very sad end to a tragic character. An unwilling villain or a psychopath or just a pathetic man with cruel intentions? No matter how you slice it, The Penguin is a great choice for this list.

5. Captain Vidal-Pan's Labyrinth

So here's a character whose absolutely mean and ruthless and kills without regard for human life but he's also a man with scruples. He really believes that he's someone great. He believes that at any cost, he must carry on his legacy. He measures success in terms of achievement. There really are people like this, namely Republicans. He kills people because he believes it's the right thing to do and he'll be damned if any women or pesky kids stand in his way. But at any cost, he needs his son to survive him and he needs to win the war against the Spanish rebels. He's a man who sees in black and white. He has been told that what he's fighting for is right and that's what he believes in. Cruel competition and the progression of his bloodline and his race are his primary goals. He's pretty relentless and unstoppable too. When he's stabbed in the face, he simply sews his cheek shut. A soldier by blood, when his father gave him a watch as a child, he kept the watch his entire life so he could see the time when he died. This isn't a soulless villain, but a man of strict scruples who personifies militaristic cruelty.

4. Hans Landa-Inglourious Basterds
Suave. Charismatic. Aggressive. Thinks like a Jew. These are a few ways to attempt to try and describe the brilliant character of Hans Landa the Jew Hunter. The 2nd Nazi on the list, he really doesn't fit the bill of a typical Nazi officer. He doesn't seem outwardly prejudiced or rigid and militaristic. He seems like if anything else, a detective as he describes himself, and a particularly effective detective. He might come off as conceited but he has a reason to be. He's good at what he does. You also have to ask yourself, how can a guy this charming be evil? He's not necessarily mean or sadistic. Quite the opposite. He's polite and outgoing and multi-lingual, but his actions are purely motivated by furthering his own goals. I think everyone can agree that Landa is a great villain and a worthy addition to this list.

3. The T-1000-Terminator 2

What do you do about a villain who cannot be stopped? He can't be shot. He can't be burned. He can't be frozen and he can shapeshift, alter his voice and run faster than you can drive a car. He can go through walls and turn into liquid metal too. The T-1000 is a scary character because there's a sense of impending dread every time he's on screen. He will kill his target and rather than fighting him, the protagonists of the movie merely run from him the entire time. His powers are almost unfairly advantageous. You begin to doubt that even Arnold will be able to defeat this "machine" at a certain point in the movie. He doesn't blink either. He can act human and he can fake it but there's something distinctly wrong with him the entire time. Something totally robotic from his sharp features to his undamagable cop uniform which he wears for the duration of the film. He made famous the "T-1000" run too.

2. Darth Vader-The Star Wars Trilogy

The "big daddy" of all villians. Like a few others on this list, at one point Darth Vader was good. He was Luke's father, the mysterious ace pilot and Jedi, Anakin Skywalker. As played by Sebastian Shaw. Little is known about what drove Vader to the dark side (since the shitty movies don't count in my book) but Vader is the quintessential villain and is the driving iconography behind Star Wars, and even the sci fi genre in general. He's menacing. He has a heart and he's also the father of the central protagonist, which makes him harder to fight and also harder for the audience to hate. He has a connection with the good guys but for whatever reason, he can't seem to make the crossover. Unlike most of the other villains who are famous in movies, Vader is able to finally feel pity for his son and see the error in his ways. In his final moments he's seen not as a machine but a man, maskless and vunerable. It's one of the greatest moments of redemption in any film. Red lighsabers. The breathing. The imperial march. The voice. Everything about Darth Vader is villanious and iconic which makes him an integral part of ANY villains list.

1. The Joker-The Dark Knight Some of you might be thinking this choice is a bit of a bias...but where would such a bias originate from? Notice Jack's Joker never made the list and I consider him a separate character so it's clearly not a pre established fascination with the idea of the Joker. It's because I knew from the start there was something special and something memorable about this version of the character. The first time I saw Ledger's Joker I was unsure. This was a new take. A dirty punk joker. A long haired wild man. What was he capable of? Was he going to be some young menace type or a calculating psychopath? Then I saw the trailer and I knew as early as January a full year before the academy awards that Ledger would be in for the Best Supporter actor nod the next year. Then tragedy struck and Ledger died, leaving us this final (hopefully) great memorable film performance. By the time summer rolled around and the hype kicked up...it seemed I wasn't alone. This chord that this quirky and genius portrayl of the Joker struck with me was striking with everyone else too. Tons of fans were hopping onto the band wagon. Whether they were teenagers or whether they were adult screen writers, just about everyone was able to be wowed by this performance and this character. How can you beat a villain whose right? Too fearless to be intimidated into the sense of morals that keeps the rest of society in check here's a guy who is basically speaking the truth. He's intrested in "humor" and intimidation factors to get what he wants...which he basically determines on a whim. He just "does things". When the law gets in his way to try and intimidate him into stopping by jailing him or threatening phsyical violence...he laughs in its face. When Batman gets in his way he's intrigued. Here's another man whose not impeded by the law and does what he pleases. But he does it to bring about justice to the masses. What does he owe them? Why do they never have to say thank you? For these reasons and his menace and his look and his various quirks and ticks that make the Joker seem like a REAL person, not just a real psychopath, the Joker is the number one movie villain of all time. In the past 2 years alone, he's garnered as much hype as some of the all time greats in cinema. He can never be truly imitated and his performance will never be forgotten as one of the most chilling and intense roles to ever appear on the screen. He carries a brutal and elemental film, a blockbuster of the most "dark" and unexpected kind. He might even make the viewer question their sense of morals...because as cruel as he can be, at times he makes it look like fun.


Well that wraps up this entry. Stay tooned' for more.

Monday, March 8, 2010

The Oscar 2010 Fallout

THE ACADEMY AWARDS!!!!
And without further ado...I give you my twisted rendition of the Oscars 2010. Click on the images to enlarge them to better read the text