Thursday, June 9, 2011

Ten badass women of cinema from 2010

You’d think by now I’d have stopped harping on the 2010 and I’d be preparing myself for 2012 by building a bomb shelter that can withstand the wrath of angry birds. But if MTV is allowed to ham up twitter for a night giving twilight more awards than Meryl Strepe’s earned in her career, I think I can be allowed to backtrack.
I noticed that year after year even though the academy doles out best actress awards for inspiring feminine roles defying societal gender constraints and rising to positions of prestige; little recognition goes toward the BADASS women of cinema. In 2010 in particular I noticed no less than TEN “tough broads” on the screen. For the most part, the characters on this list made their respective movies enjoyable for me and were by all accounts the “saving grace” often lacking the graceful aspect.
More attractive than Tim Burton!
10. Kathryn Bigelow –Director of The Hurt Locker
Ok so technically this is cheating, but sue me this is my blog. It’d be like trying to sue Willy Wonka for murdering the fat kid. You think anyone would believe you that he cast him into a river of chocolate and fed him to orange midgets? THIS IS MY MECCA! But seriously it is pretty cool that she beat her ex, Jim Cameron at his own game. Hopefully this encourages him to take revenge by making Avatar 2 NOT CRAP.
The fact that she wasn't a Padme decoy in the prequels was a missed opportunity
9. Mila Kunis as Lily-Black Swan
While all the attention of this overhyped movie (yes I’ll admit I played into it) was on doe-eyed Natalie, the seductive and dark side of Meg Griffin was the real prize. You never knew throughout if she was just a friendly person or if she was and evil ballet dancer.
Light up T shirts were cool in the 90s...does this make her a hipster?
8. Olivia Wilde as Quorra-Tron Legacy
If someone told me that Olivia Wilde played a computer capable of learning that was eager to learn about the ways of the world in a film I’d say it sounded like the worst thing ever…and yet her performance makes perfect sense given that description. Quirky, open-minded and calculating and able to ride a fucking lightcycle.
Homely as a white Aunt Jemima
7. Amy Adams as Charlene –The Fighter
Another movie that the American public ruined for me before I even saw it, while Amy Adams isn’t the best part of the movie (that seat is reserved for Christian Bale, though he’d probably take it by force even if it wasn’t), we sure did see a LOT of her…And the best part? She slaps down chain-smoking red neck crones on the front porch. Go massholes!
no that's not Adam Lambert
6. Noomi Rapace as Lisbeth Sander-The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo series
When America found out Russia was planning to send humans into space we had to beat them to it. Sweden may have gotten the jump on us with this franchise, but we’re already flaunting the new version and in a week Rooney Mara’s nipples are some of the most famous in the world. Even so…it might be worth watching the OLD version.
Would you still like this as much if it turned out she was actually a midget?
5. Chloe Moretz as Hit Girl-Kick Ass
I didn’t like this character nearly as much as everyone else did. Not because her use of the C word offended me…nor did her butchery of everyone who opposed her. I just thought it was an over played character that felt out of her element in the movie. Even so…deserves a spot on the list right?
Cockblocked by the aspect ratio.
4. Emma Stone as Olive-Easy A
Never have I seen such charming female manipulation and deceit since Mean Girls until Easy A. What a refreshing little slice of charm…and Emma Stone whores it up in the best way possible. She doesn’t seem to have that transparent hotness that other girls of her looks have. She’s cool. I feel like she’d put someone in her place if they were pouty enough.
She's hunting down Rob Marshall for Nine.
3. Marion Cotillard as Mal-Inception
I’m not a fan of Inception. In fact it shook my entire faith in Nolan as a director. But in a sea of wooden performances and floating people in tight-fitting vests, one character in the film really stood out. Mal is as close as the movie comes to a true antagonist and she’s absolutely chilling. Unforgiving and totally insane, Marion Cotillard proves as this suicidal dreamer that she is one of the most versatile actresses yet again.
Incoming File Transmission from Heaven
2. Michelle Rodriguez as Luz-Machete
I love it when Michelle Rodriguez plays butch, ass kicking roles. I don’t think we’ll ever top seeing her with a shot out eyeball as a resilient taco-selling revolutionary shooting double barreled shotguns from the hip. She’s become a parody of herself, but often times that’s when actors really find their niche.
Matt Damon's waiting it out.
1. Hallie Steinfeld as Mattie Ross-True Grit
This performance blew me away. I think it blew away everyone who saw the film actually. It’s a true shame that they discriminate based on age at the Oscars (believe me they do) with the assumption that the actor or actress will win when they get a little older. Confident, badass, and able to wear the shit out of a hat too big for her, Mattie was not just the best female character of the year, but maybe the best character of the year in general…and generally children ruin movies. Take that Anakin.

Well that wraps up the list. Hopefully I’ll be able to gush about how badass it is when Ron’s mom finally gets Helena Bonham Carter to shut the fuck up and cease her Wicked Witch of the West impression in the Harry Potter series.

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